WHY narcissists are so EXHAUSTING and Emotionally Draining?

Narcissists will leave you emotionally drained and exhausted.  You might be wondering why this is happening and why narcissists are so exhausting.

As I discussed in my previous episodes that narcissists are extremely manipulative, they lack empathy and feel that they are superior to other people. When you are in a relationship with the narcissist you can never relax, and it feels like you are walking on eggshells. The reason being is the continuous arguments with the narcissist which leaves very confused and mentally fatigued.  You will be thinking over and over again about the situation to the point where it exhausts you. You might even be overthinking how to speak to the narcissist and how to approach him or her because you are afraid of the narcissistic lash out on you which again leaves you so drained. 

If you have any small criticism towards the narcissist even if you did not mean to. It is considered for the narcissist as if you are attacking him or her. The narcissist will consider you as an enemy and will fight you. If you respond trying to explain yourself, you might even anger the narcissist more. The narcissist will start his or her tactics against you from silent treatment to enablers. I discuss more about enablers and how the narcissist provokes you in my previous episodes. I also what happens when the narcissist breaks up with you. I will put the links down below for you to check it out. 

The narcissist will leave you no option but to have to always defend yourself. You are constantly trying to deal with the injured self of the narcissist as if you are dealing with a child with tantrums. This could be for any harmless little things for example saying hello to someone or if someone phoned to check on you from family and friends. You are trying your best to do nice things or not aggravate the situation and yet this will never work well with the narcissist. It will leave you questioning yourself about what you said or what you did or didn’t even do. This kind of mental manipulation and blame is exhausting which will leave you mentally drained and fatigued.

In addition to all that is the narcissist does not respect your boundaries. The narcissist will always disrespect them and no matter what you say to them. If you defend your boundaries and what is acceptable to you and what is not to the narcissist you will be ignored. This is alone is so difficult and exhausting when someone doesn’t listen to you nor respect your boundaries. Narcissist never feel shame nor remorse for his or her actions. 

Also, if you tell the narcissist a secret or if you wish to have a private life the narcissist will violate that. if you did not do what he or she says they will share your secrets or make up dirty lies about you to everyone to turn people against you. As well as the narcissist family where one parent or both are narcissists. You will be living in hell; the parent will enable the narcissistic behaviour and will make excuses for the abuse. It is a constant drama within the family, and it is always someone else’s fault. Such a dysfunctional family is delusional and have a high sense of entitlement. The narcissist will try to bring you down and make remarks that you are lucky to be with him or her.  The grandiose way that the narcissist perceives himself or herself is unimaginable plus his or her delusions of reality. Therefore, you are overwhelmed with such demands and fake life and the narcissist fantasy. You will be struggling with the narcissist to see reality. The narcissist will never relate to you in any way. you might even be called crazy or unreasonable. If you try to tell the narcissist about what is going on and is happening, he or she will perceive it as an attack from you. It is never enough with the narcissist. This will make you feel trapped and humiliated. 

Additionally, if you engage in the narcissist smear campaign you will experience that the narcissist twisted, lied, and made-up stories to make you look like a bad person and a narcissist is a good person. People may start to shame you and blame you. Remember if people who are involved are good people, they will talk to you to get your side of the story and think about everything. All that is happening is energy-draining and will exhaust you. 

The bottom line is that no matter what you do to the narcissist still not enough. Acknowledge the red flags in the relationship with the narcissist. It is not okay to be disrespected or manipulated at all. It is not okay to live your life as if you are riding a roller coaster. It is not fair for you to be emotionally and physically exhausted by the narcissist. Remember that You will never have a stable life with the narcissist. Not to mention that life with the narcissist can be difficult and you want someone who supports you and make you follow your dreams. Not draining you emotionally and mentally.

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