At some point in our life without realising it. We blame ourselves for things that are not worth it or even blame ourselves for things we didn’t even do. We start the cycle of dwelling on the issue, and we overthink it. It is difficult to recognize it at the time until our brain is so tired then we realize that we are exhausted from overthinking. When you are overthinking, normally you are worried most of the time about things and you bring yourself down by remembering your mistakes and could have gone better. You may also have difficulty sleeping and you dwell on the situation over and over to the point where your brain won’t shut off. It drives you crazy and stressed.
Overthinking is a habit and normally we get ourselves conditioned to it and we keep the cycle of overthinking.
It is an energy-draining cycle and could create many other health issues such as stress, depression, and anxiety. It also clouds your judgement and how you think and behave.
I thought I would share with you my best five steps that I use and hopefully, you find them helpful.
Here are 5 easy steps that you help you deal with overthinking.
1- Focus on what you can change in your life
It is impossible to try and control every aspect of your life. Acknowledge that you cannot control everything around us. For example, you cannot control time, the weather nor the universe. You cannot control someone’s behaviour however you can control yourself and your behaviour only. Once you realize that you cannot control everything around, but you are only in control of yourself then will feel huge relief as often people try to control everything and forget that is impossible or pretty much difficult. You will meet people who will try to control you and you have to stay strong and true to yourself. When you know who you are and what you want to achieve in any area in your life no one will control and soon enough they will realize that they cannot control you, and you cannot control them.
2- Meditation or mindfulness
Whenever you feel overwhelmed and started to overthink you can try mindfulness meditation. This will help you to get some clarity and being present. You can combine meditation and mindfulness together to make you let go of your negative thoughts; it will calm your mind and slow it down when you are overthinking. I love the fact that it focuses on the now and it will bring you to the present moment, not the future and not the past which is great. As when we overthink normally either we are dwelling on the past or we are worrying about the future so when you practice mindfulness it will bring you the present moment and the more often you practice the more you will be present and not worrying or overthinking as much. There is plenty of guidance online whether on YouTube or you can down an app such as Headspace. I used Headspace in the past and I recommend if you are a beginner, I know what works for me and I just do it alone so figure out what works for you and keep practising and you will see a huge difference in your mind and attitude.
3- Parent yourself
Self-parenting is so important. We often talk to ourselves negatively and we don’t even realize it. The thing is every time we talk to ourselves badly and undermining ourselves and our emotions without knowing it, the thoughts will go directly to our subconscious mind and will reprogram our mind to be negative. It is important that you catch yourself when you are talking negatively about yourself, and you need to try and stop it. Instead have a conversation with yourself as if you are talking to someone you care about and love. Also, accept that you have feelings and sometimes you get overwhelmed so take a few deep breaths and start having a conversation with yourself. During the conversation with yourself don’t blame yourself and don’t judge yourself. The whole idea of parenting yourself is to have an honest conversation as if you were talking to someone you love and care about. Pay attention to your good and positive qualities and praise yourself for them. Celebrate yourself for catching those negative thoughts or for catching yourself overthinking. Remember don’t be too hard on yourself, you are human, and it is okay to make mistakes as long as you acknowledge those mistakes and learn from them then move forward without dwelling on them.
4- Let go
If you are dwelling in your past this will not make you live yourself to the fullest. Understand that the past will never change you cannot reverse back time. No matter what you do now will not change the past however it will change your future. Make a decision about what do you want in your future. Do you want to repeat the cycle of overthinking and living in stress, or do you want a happy normal life? Letting go is now an easy thing to do I get it I was in your shoes before however, I realized that carrying the past you with is like carrying a heavy bag with you everywhere you go. I realized that is very exhausting, so I started researching how to let go. I came across a great book that is “Letting GO” by DR. David Hawkins. This book is amazing and helped me to let go and look at things differently.
5- Question your fears
When you are parenting yourself, you can ask yourself what your fears are. Often overthinking comes from fears. You can also write down your fears and figure out why you are afraid. Facing your fears will help you grow and develop a strong mentality. If you don’t face your fears, you will be stuck in the same thing and that is not what life is. Life is about experiencing and living. You can live your life if you are stuck in your fears. There are many ways can implement to overcome your fears depends on your situation such as taking action and face it anyway or talk to a therapist. If you have a logical mind, you can write down the pros and cons of your fears. Write down what will it be like when you face your fears and what does it make you feel. This will help you feel empowered, and you will be able to take action and face your fears.
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